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Everlasting Matrimony: Pearls of Wisdom From Couples Married 50 Years or More


by Sheryl P. Kurland



Real-life relationship experts – couples married 50+ years – answer your questions. 

Each question is answered by one couple, separately by husband and wife.






I love my wife, but lately she’s developed a negative attitude.  In recent years, we have experienced a number of personal disappointments and family tragedy.  Things seem to have finally reached a calm, but my wife has turned into a total cynic.  Her negativity is draining the life out of me.  What can I say or do to help turn this situation around?  Please do not suggest counseling; she won’t go.  Samuel



I love my wife although seldom say it.  IMPORTANT: I show it by the many small things I do!!!  Get her pills set up for her with water, in the AM and PM.  Give her flowers on holidays and birthdays.  Give her room, i.e., with her bad back she watches TV and reads a lot.  I spend my time on the computer upstairs, or watch another TV program in a different room if I don’t like her choice.  Always kiss each other good night before going to sleep – even if it’s 1 AM.  Sid



There was a song written in my teenage years that applies to your wife’s problem.  Its title is “Accentuate the Positive.”  I remember only a few lines.  “You’ve got to accentuate the Positive – latch on to the Affirmative and don’t mess with Mr. In-Between.”  Another song sung by Rosemary Clooney is titled “Count Your Blessings.”  It seems to me that if she makes a list, “Blessings” will always even out.  Lillian


Sid and Lillian have been married 57 years 



Do you have a relationship problem you need help resolving?  Submit questions to Sheryl Kurland, author of Everlasting Matrimony,
at  She’ll have your question answered by a couple married 50-plus years. 
Visit her book web site,


P.S. Here's a great gift tip when you are single or married ... Even though I am a newlywed and everything is fresh I am often fresh out of ideas for date night ...
Can you relate?! This also comes in handy for time outs with friends & family. ! It's ... the Entertainment Book! Enjoy! Viveca